What is your vision for yourself as a mom?
Who do you want to be? Where are you now in comparison?
Before we dive further into the topic, what are your initial reactions to the idea of having a “vision” for yourself as a mom? Sometimes, the idea of creating a vision, vision boards, or the process of developing an idea in your mind in order to help lead to the creation of that reality doesn’t always sit well for people. For some, it can feel a bit silly or a waste of time. For others their vision may feel like a far-fetched ideal, making it uncomfortable to really think about it because you are so far from that right now. If you have any sense of hesitancy, that’s okay. Consider the potential benefits in clarifying your vision and then working toward it. And remember, this is your vision: what is important to you and not anyone else.
Follow these steps and write down your answers as you go.
Take some time to reflect on who you are now:
What are your strengths as a person and a mom? Are you positive, encouraging, loving, honest? What are your core strengths and areas that make you unique and special?
Then, think about the areas you feel you need to improve on right now. For some of us, this second question is easier to answer because we’re so used to looking at our flaws and where we seem to be lacking. Maybe you need to be more patient, more kind, or more efficient.
What do you admire in others, specifically those you are close to?
A great way to figure out who you want to be is to look at what you admire in those you are closest to. This doesn’t mean that you need to be like them or copy what they are doing, but instead this can help to clarify your values. When you look at your friends and family, are there commonalities they share in regard to their personality or characteristics? For example, are many of your friends generous, even-tempered, or open-minded? Without realizing it, we may surround ourselves with people who have qualities we admire.
[bctt tweet=”A great way to figure out who you want to be is to look at what you admire in those you are closest to. ” username=”GetMomBalanced”]
The opposite can be true too in that we may gravitate toward people who share our similar “bad” habits or qualities. Think about it: If you’re always late, you may not feel as comfortable around people who are constantly on time. You may be more connected to people who also run late because you won’t be as likely to feel bad. So, take some time to think about the good and not-as-good qualities that your inner circle possesses.
Which words resonate most?
When you look at all of these qualities that you have written down, what stands out? What are the core words, qualities or characteristics that describe who you want to be as a mom. Some of these ideas may be who you want to be as a person, not just as a mom, and that’s great because you are a person first (I know, that’s hard to remember and to feel!). Clarify your top 3-5 words that describe who you want to be and what is more important to you. You may already be some of these ideas, while others you’ll need to work toward.
Work toward being that vision
Start by picking the quality or word that means the most to you and work on being that. If the word is “loving” then try to do everything with love (that’s hard sometimes, I know!). If you are choosing to focus on patience, keep reminding yourself about it and it will become more of a habit. Even if you don’t think of yourself as a patient person, try to act “as if” you are patient. How would a patient person handle the 3-year old taking his sweet time to put those shoes on? What would a patient person do when the line at Starbucks seems to be taking forever? Focusing on living out one of your vision words doesn’t mean that you get it right all of the time, but it means that you are intentional about who you want to be.
I know we’re all busy, but take the time to clarify your vision, and then narrow in on the first area you want to work on. If you don’t feel like you have the time right now, consider doing this right before you go to bed, or while you’re waiting for your kids during their swim lesson. Chances are, you can find the time to do this if you look for it.
Once you’ve come up with your words, create something that helps to remind you of your overall vision or even this one idea. For example, you could create a vision board that visually represents who you want to be with words, pictures and ideas. If you’re not creative in this way, simply use post it notes or other visuals to remind you of your vision words. We want to keep these ideas fresh in our minds and stay focused on living out these words, even if we don’t always get it right.
Care to share your vision word for the week? Let us know what you’re doing to live that in your everyday life.